The idea of a "two-legged" console table turns out to be the perfect solution. ("Two-legged" console can't be the real name of such a thing. A gold star to anyone who can tell me what these are called).
Much slimmer than the four legged variety and because they don't have hind legs that bump up against the baseboard, we gain a precious inch by being able to affix the table directly to the wall.
Now...where to find and purchase such a thing? You all know by now how cheap I am, so I started at my local Salvation Army. I knew it wasn't likely that I'd find exactly what I was looking for there, but I figured I could get a full size table and have Chris cut it down to just the two legs we need. After many visits, I finally found it.
Marked down to $35 (from $135!!!), it is curvy enough not to be boring but plain enough to let the mirror be the star. All we'll need to do is cut it down and paint it.
On the way home from picking it up, I noticed that Chris was lost in thought.
He said he was wondering what kind of saw he'd need to use to cut it. "Oh, that's simple," I told him. "You'd use a table saw".
"That makes no sense. Why would I use a table saw?"
"Duh, Chris...because it's a table. To cut a table in half you'd use a table saw."
I'll be here all week ladies and gentlemen.